![]() But she was not necessarily trying to stamp out all evidence of his urges. The conclusion you come to is true, but the path you take is ( IMO) not justifiable. This is how I know that attempting to stamp out all evidence that some people have such urges only makes the problem more ugly. He chose to turn away from the powerful urge to rape, and it had nothing do to with fear. However, this is a non sequitur: it does not support your thesis, " Fear of sex is the power of rape". Re your story about your male friend I am glad you talked to him, and I am glad he changed his mind. ![]() I believe it is possible for a particular rape to be a crime worse than a particular murder, and I believe it is possible for a particular murder to be worse than a particular rape. Many people will unhesitatingly agree with this statement, but if presented with a rotten apple and a fresh orange, will choose the orange. To my mind, "rape is not as bad as murder" is akin to " apples taste better than oranges". To my mind, this is related to the issue of euthanasia: is it a kinder, more humane thing to end a life, or to allow (or, in the context of this argument, cause) a great deal of pain and allow life to continue? The degree of a crime is a function of cause, effect, society, the values of the person judging, and too many other things 'the worst crime' is far too subjective a term to be pinned down. There are some who would argue that point. I would like, however, to help paint a more complete picture.) Rape is bad, but it is not the worst crime: it is not murder. (This is not an attack on you please realise, I do not wish to do that. If I may, I would like to write a counterpoint. And won’t let anyone mourn me as if I were.Ī very good writeup, futurebird. I told the police that I don't believe in " sex crimes" only in assault and was very proud of myself for standing up for the things I believe in. I asked the detective to treat the case as " poisoning and assault" (they put something in my drink, then picked me up in the parking lot.) I am bitter and angry: But I have not changed my views. Well, oddly enough that wish came true, last year… (Often getting in arguments with my peers.) Depending on my line of argument I’ve been threatened and on more than one occasion someone has said “ I hope someone rapes you, then you’ll learn to be more sensitive!!” I have exposed these views on rape since I was 16 or so. I am perplexed by the emphasis some feminists place on rape as a “ crime against women” this only continues to reaffirm the notion that women are primarily valuable as sexual chattel rather than as people? That is, I think, a remnant of the times when a woman who was not a virgin was thought unfit for marriage. I say it is “hysterical” because in comparison to assault or murder it seems somewhat out of proportion. I am perplexed by the nearly hysterical reaction some people have to the idea of rape. He said that the fact that I listened gave him the chance to really think about what he was saying, and to feel vindicated in his anger without needing to act in revenge. (!) This made him feel even more alienated and angry. Later he told me that he had tried to talk about it with another friend and she was so shocked and angry that she still would not speak to him. He seemed to feel better since he’d talked about it. After talking some more, he agreed with me-and let the notion go. ![]() I also pointed out that hurting the woman wouldn’t really make anything better or make him feel any better. I comforted him and told him he had a right to feel angry. Since he was good friend, he was able to tell me how angry he was. I have a good male friend who has considered rape as a reasonable option for "getting back” at a woman who cheated on him and then left him. It is a form of assault that, due to our cultural biases about sex, may to lead to great and lasting emotional trauma for the victim. ![]() Rape is bad, but it is not the worst crime: it is not murder. The more power we lend to the idea of rape as the "worst thing that can happen to a woman" the more powerful angry men (and women) who are likely rape people will feel. ![]()
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